Random Observation

I’m currently (as in right now! this very second!) working on the Fringe Show, and typed in the words “Barack Obama” into the document.  Spell check doesn’t like either of them.  Instead it wants me to replace “Barack” with barrack, barracks, or barak and Obama with Osama or Bema.

Hilary Clinton? It recognizes just fine.

RIP Earle Hagen

Earle Hagen died today, the composer of arguably one of the most well-known pieces written for alto sax, Harlem Nocturne.  I used it in I Hate Kenny G (in fact I had to write a story with that song in mind so I could work it into the script), I played it as the random “mood music” for a P.I. spoof that a buddy of mine wrote, as a featured soloist with the Minnetonka Concert Band, Minnesota Freedom Band, Kalamazoo College Concert Band, Kalamazoo College Jazz Band, and Minnetonka High School Jazz Band, and even for offeratory music at a church in Hackensack, Minnesota (the minister said they got the highest donation they’d had in five years that day).

As cheesy and iconic as it is, it’s a piece that I love performing more than any other, with possibly the exception of the Glazunov Alto Saxophone Concerto.

So when I play it in Kenny at the BLB on Father’s Day, this one’s going out to Earle.

Show Description

We’re still changing the title, but here’s the show description:

Rebelling against politics, proselytizing, and puking, writer / performer Allegra Lingo surfs the waves of her Baptist upbringing and gay Catholic presence, and finds her own island.

Old Man on the Bench

I was driving home from a meeting with Anthony today and saw an old black man in a tie-dyed shirt and blazingly white afro.  I had actually seen him earlier today while I was driving to my meeting, but this time he was sitting at a bus stop bench, and had pulled out a guitar.  He wasn’t singing, at least quite yet.  But it made me think of Cracker Jack, the “withered old black man with the blues growl” that Rik talks about in Glorious Noise. For Rik, that old blues player, on his bench of the Mississippi River in New Orleans, is a touchstone of the city.  He embodied all that the city was, and maybe never will be again.

I don’t really have a touchstone like that.  I’m too young.  I recognize that fact.  I don’t have a touchstone for me, for my life, for my place.  I’m still finding those things that root me, ground me, make me me and serve as a symbol for all that I stand for.

But today that old black man made me think of Rik, made me excited about writing my new show, finding that image that people take away and keep coming back to, years after they see it (or maybe I just keep it in my head since I’m, you know, part of the show now and hear it often).

It’s time to write something legible.

5/5ths video

So a few weeks ago, the Rockstars did one fifth of Romeo and Juliet for the Minnesota Fringe annual fundraiser.  Here’s a video snippet of each of the acts.

Ireland’s Eurovision Entry

I present…DUSTIN THE TURKEY!

This isn’t actually their entry–this is the song that came out while I was living there:

THIS is the actual entry:

Myth Me Musings 32: The Problem with the Baptists

IAmidst a few protests, Amy and I headed to Ridgewood Church on Sunday.  We dragged Anthony, the director of this whole project along as well (although he sat on his own, which was a good thing).  It reminded me of where I started.  And why it’s definitely not the finish line for me.

The thing about the service is that there was a lot of joy…with no happiness.  That sounds a bit weird, I know, but it’s the best phrase I have.  The Catholic church, at least for me, is solemn with joy at the center, and I think that’s what worship should be.

We sat behind a couple with their children.  Amy dubbed the man “creepy” about three minutes into the service.  His wife was one of the hands raised at all times, “amen”ing this and that.  There’s just something that says she’s trying to hard.  In back of us was a woman who remembered me from my days as a kid there.

I talked to a couple friends of mine from high school–one who was a member of the church with me when we were little, one who became a member while we were all in college.  That provided much of the humor.  I’m not sure what was my favorite: when my friend was complimenting Amy and I on our outfits for the day, and they were giving me some gentle ribbing for actually looking put-together, and she said “got to look all sharp and straight…” [last word swallowed as she realized what adjective she was employing, which I thought was hilarious]  My other favorite was as we were talking about the pastor’s oldest daughter who is having a bridal shower in a couple weeks.  And my friend said, “she’s marrying a Lutheran seminary student–she’s totally gone to the other side!”

If Lutherans are “the other side”, I think I’m so far off the square that I’m unrecognizable to any of them.

There was part of me that wanted to enjoy the service, not find it a bit silly.  But after worshipping as a Catholic, even though I haven’t been the best mass attender, I couldn’t help myself.  The youth group leaders placing their hands on the graduating high school seniors’ backs as the youth pastor (why are youth pastors always creepy?  And this one was wearing a smiley face tie–too look young and fun?  No, you look like you’re going to show up on Dateline) blessed their accomplishments and went on to prostelytize (drink!) that wherever they are on their faith journey is fine, but graduating from high school is not that great an accomplishment because pretty much anyone who is in high school does it, but graduating to God and accepting Jesus into your heart is a much greater accomplishment, and if they hadn’t done it already they really should.

I could have done without the African drum beats that accompanied the reading from Revelations that led into a bunch of suburban white people attempting to clap along to an actually cool song with cool beats.

I could have done without the worksheet in my bulletin to fill in, according to the slides, the points of the sermon we were supposed to take away.

The sermon was “How Do I Know God Loves Me?”  And these were the five points:

• Because he made me.  [I nearly wrote that wrong because Amy grabbed a pen and filled it in as “because he told me so”.]
• Because he notices every detail.
• He gave me the capacity to experience pleasure.
• He has good plans for my life.
• He sent Christ to forgive your sins.

It’s not that I don’t agree with all of those things.  Well, maybe except for number two because, really, I think God is pretty much in the tub the most of the time enjoying a bubble bath and can’t be bothered if I chose to wear my purple striped shirt or bright blue one to work.

But the part I differ, I guess, from everyone sitting in that church except the two that were with me is that being gay is part of those things.

• I don’t believe being gay is a choice, and I do believe that God made me.  So therefore, if God loves me because he made me, he made me gay and therefore it’s okay.
• I experience pleasure by being in love.  I am in love.  So if God is the one who gave me the power to experience pleasure, he must know how I feel being in love.
• I feel like my life is on track in all areas right now (except for that pesky health part, but even that is getting better).  And I thank God for his hand in my life, because I don’t believe in coincidence.  I believe in cause and effect in all things.  So, therefore, if I feel like my life is full of good plans, God’s gotta be okay with them.
• Yes, Christ was sent to forgive my sins.  Except, taking into account the logic behind the above three statements, being gay isn’t one of them.

I don’t want to sound like I am negating or dissing anyone who feels their faith is at home in that church.  I know it means a lot to the people who belong there, and have for years.

But I just don’t get it.  I never have.

Under much protest, I put in a welcome card with both of our names on it.  We got a call from the welcome bot tonight.  She asked if I had any questions.   I said no.

But after I hung up the phone, I realized I should have said we were looking to get married there, and could we arrange that?  And no, we’re not looking to get married there.  Or yet, for that matter.  But hearing the stammer on the other end of the phone to a childhood member of the church who has just wandered home would have been really, really, fun.

Apparently it’s a good day in California

So the California Supreme Court deemed the state ban on same-sex marriage unconstitutional. I have to admit, I’m currently weighing the pros and cons of this.

Con: What is the Supreme Court thinking, doing this less than six months before the 2008 presidential election? If there’s anything that will galvanize the religious-right to get their Republican-lovin’ selves to the polls it will be those moral-bucking homo heathens threatening the fabric of all that is good and economically sustainable. We couldn’t have done this in a election off year?

Pro: Yea!

Con: Oh feck. I guess this means that, until they place a residency restriction on the validity of the licenses, I’m that much closer to actually having what I want. Which would require some work that was hopefully gonna rest on Schnappi’s shoulders (until she totally shot that idea down–dammit).

Pro: Yea!

That’s about as intelligent as I get today.

Apparently, I don’t exist

Schnappi had this cool thing on her blog to see how many people in the US have your name, so I decided to check it out, just to make sure that I am, indeed, the only Allegra Lingo. And this is the result that I got.




HowManyOfMe.com

There are 0 people with my name in the U.S.A. How many have your name?

Wha?  Did I really not have to do taxes or something?  I am, apparently, just a non-entity.  Other things that I learned:

• There are 3,040 people in the US with the first name Allegra.
• Statistically it is the 3176th must popular first name.
• There are 3709 people with the last name Lingo.
• It is the 8977th most popular last name.

Unique, is what I am.

Oh boy

Amy and I were walking through Gavidae and saw this today:

I nearly took out my credit card right there.

Just in case.